Friday, December 31, 2010

Rose's Feast Days

Yesterday, December 30, the anniversary of the beginning of the trauma of losing Rose...

In Memory of Our Rose Marie

Born on March 19

St. Joseph's Feast Day,
Patron Saint of Families

Baptized on December 6
St. Nicholas' Feast Day
Patron Saint of Children

Died on January 5
St. John Neumann's Feast Day
Patron Saint of Catholic Education
and parish where Rose was baptized

Our blessed Rose has interceded for many people
so please continue to ask her to whisper your petition
into our Loving Savior's ear...

Sweetest Rose...pray for us.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

With Hope

Kevin wrote...

..."I remember hearing about your loss and thinking... "how could anyone deal with such a thing". I now know that it is possible to move beyond the sorrow and see the gifts the cross can bring. When the accident was happening, all I could hear in my head were two words... "Trust" and "Wait". They carried me to this day. And as I listen to your songs, as a father that has lost a child, I find it an amazing thing that you've put into words so much of what I feel. We know we'll see our daughters someday. And for now, we'll just have to smile and wait. It will be a wonderful thing..."

With Hope

By Steven Curtis Chapman

1 Thess. 4:13-14 / Heb. 6:9, 10:23

This is not at all how
We thought it was supposed to be
We had so many plans for you
We had so many dreams
And now you've gone away
And left us with the memories of your smile
And nothing we can say
And nothing we can do
Can take away the pain
The pain of losing you, but...

We can cry with hope
We can say goodbye with hope
Because we know our goodbye is not the end,
And we can grieve with hope
Because we believe with hope
There's a place by God's grace
There's a place where we'll see your face again
We'll see your face again

And never have I known
Anything so hard to understand
And never have I questioned more
The wisdom of God's plan
But through the cloud of tears
I see the Father's smile and say well done
And I imagine you
Where you wanted most to be
Seeing all your dreams come true
Because now you're home
And now you're free, and ...

We have this hope as an anchor
Because we believe that everything
God promised us is true, so ...

We wait with hope
And we ache with hope
We hold on with hope
We let go with hope

On Chaos...

I thankfully have been extra nice to my home of very sweet people the last few days...

My number one goal in life outside of doing God's will has become to embrace the chaos each day offers.

Now, if I do not start my day off right with giving it to God, I am screwed anyways and this theory really doesn't work as well...

Recently, God graciously revealed the not so nice tone I was using with my children when they started speaking in this same tone to each other. Very humbling for those who have yet to experience this...

I looked at why I was speaking this way to these kind souls. Small things were catching me off guard and I was reacting to these things instead of expecting them to happen in a home full of people with different personalities.

So I am working diligently to try and embrace the chaos at the beginning of the day and I am finding myself responding differently to things that normally would set me off...

Now I am anticipating someone possibly spilling their drink or breaking their glass...

I am anticipating there being several temper tantrums and remind myself to give consequences instead of the same verbal reprimand day after day...

I am anticipating someone having an emotional breakdown and instead of discounting it as being tired, hungry or bored, I am trying to be more attentive to people's feelings...

I am anticipating a boo boo during the day and realizing the importance of stopping what I am doing and soothing until that particular person feels they are soothed and not when I think they should be soothed…

Some of my friends are very good at these things.

I started out pretty good, then the chaos of life that marriage and children bring crept in.

And in our home tragedy struck.

We have been in a tail spin since. Because of our suffering in some areas we are more sensitive to each other's needs but others we have graciously ignored from the heaviness of the grief.

So, for today, my conclusion to striving for balance and peace is to embrace the chaos each day offers...

On some occasions, anticipating the chaos has even brought humor at times and the ability to laugh at ourselves more often.

Thank God, God doesn't give up on teaching us like we tend to give up on ourselves or others at times...

Monday, December 6, 2010